Stamford Family Law Blog

The link between physical and financial abuse

When people say that abuse is one of the main reasons for divorce, they're correct, but they should specify exactly what type of abuse they mean. It can look very different in different situations. For instance, people could suffer from physical abuse, emotional abuse or financial abuse.

That being said, some experts do note that these are often closely connected. Two or more could take place at the same time in the same dysfunctional relationship.

A prenup can help as life changes

A prenuptial agreement helps protect your future. It helps to address a potential divorce in advance, with a focus on the way that your life may change moving forward.

To see how this works, just look at one of the more common reasons why you don't need to use a prenup: If you don't think you'll gain much that you want to protect.

Do teen marriages last?

You're 19 years old. You just finished your first year of college. You and your significant other decide that you want to get married. You're in love, you feel committed to the relationship, and you're eager to start this next stage in your life.

But is it going to last, or are you just headed for divorce?

Can marrying out of your league lead to divorce?

Are you man who wakes up every day amazed the woman you are with agreed to marry you? Of course, that is how every man should feel. But, what if you believe that your wife is out of your league? If this is the case with you, do you feel secure in your arrangement, or are you worried that this unbelievable luck will soon run out?

If you feel that your luck may soon come to an end, you may be right according to new research. It seems that men marrying women who are more physically attractive than their husband may become less committed due to circumstances around the discrepancy. When this is the case, divorce may be inevitable. What usually happens is when physical attributes don’t line up equally, the romantic relationship has a greater chance of falling apart.

Don’t make one of these mistakes during your divorce

Once the divorce process is in motion, you'll feel as if you're being pulled in many different directions. For instance, you're worried about your children one second but have to create a property and debt division checklist the next.

There are many potential mistakes lurking, with these among the most common:

  • Taking advice from anyone and everyone: It's okay to discuss your divorce with the people in your life, but don't take legal advice from them.
  • Putting your children in the middle: You need to protect your children during your divorce, not use them as pawns. Adding to this, never bad-mouth your soon-to-be ex-spouse in front of your children.
  • Focusing too much attention on one detail: For example, you may be so concerned with property division that you overlook a variety of jointly held debts. Every detail of the divorce process deserves your attention, so don't put anything important on the back burner.
  • Neglecting to plan for the future: Even though divorce has a way of taking over your life, you still need to think about the months and years to come. This will ensure that you're making the best possible decisions during your divorce, such as when negotiating property division, child custody and child support.

Asset division in divorce starts with a checklist

Asset division in divorce has the potential to be a sticking point. Even if you're both willing to work toward a compromise, you can expect to face challenges along the way.

Using a property division checklist can streamline the process and give you a better idea of what you need to negotiate during mediation. Here are four categories you can use to organize your checklist:

  • Real estate: This typically includes the marital home, but can also cover vacation property, undeveloped land and business real estate.
  • Personal property: The items you keep in your home fit within this category, with some of the most common including collectibles, electronics, rugs, antiques, furniture, clothing, home office equipment, jewelry and motor vehicles.
  • Financial assets: Often the most valuable marital resources, these range from cash on hand to bank and retirement accounts.
  • Business assets: If one or both individuals is a business owner, some assets associated with the company could potentially be subject to division in a Connecticut divorce.

Helpful tips for telling your children about divorce

It's a difficult conversation, but one that you have to have. The sooner you tell your children about your divorce the sooner you can move on with the process itself. Furthermore, this allows you to better help your children through this difficult time.

These tips will help you discuss your divorce with your children:

  • Be honest: You don't have to share details, but you should be honest about your relationship, the divorce process and what's to come. Of course, make sure the conversation is age appropriate.
  • Write out what you want to say: Just because you're speaking with your children, it doesn't mean it's any easier to explain your divorce. Writing out what you want to say will keep you on track while ensuring that you don't forget something of importance.
  • Think like your child: Don't think like an adult when telling your children about your divorce. Put yourself in your child's shoes as this will help you tailor the conversation to their needs. For example, you know that your children may take the blame for the divorce, so you can hedge this off.
  • Don't call it quits after one conversation: The initial conversation is important, but your work is never really done. You should continue to chat with your children about your divorce and the impact on their lives as often as necessary.

Easy to follow tips when asking for a prenuptial agreement

Asking for a prenuptial agreement may not be the most exciting thing you do in the time leading up to your wedding, but it could be the most important.

If this is something you want to discuss with your partner, it's best to bring it to light as soon as possible. This ensures that you have as much time as necessary to work through the details.

Are you comfortable following these co-parenting tips?

There are times when co-parenting is a breeze. There are also times when you run into one challenge after the next. If you want to experience more good than bad, you must make sound decisions.

Here are several tips you can follow to help your cause:

  • Put yourself in the other person's shoes: You must do what's best for you and your children, but that doesn't mean you should completely overlook the feelings of your ex-spouse.
  • Be flexible when possible: It's important to stick with your parenting agreement, but it's okay to adjust schedules from time to time. If both parents are flexible, everyone will win in the end.
  • Pick your battles wisely: When co-parenting, you can argue about almost anything. There are times when it makes sense to put up a fight. There are also times when it makes sense to let an issue go.
  • Communicate: This is a simple one. You need to communicate when necessary, no matter how you do it. If you can't get along when chatting in person, opt for text messages or email. Regardless of the method, communication is key.
  • Respect your children's time with your ex: Don't get in the way when your children are spending time with their other parent. Instead, take this time to do something for yourself.

Why consider mediation?

Divorce is often treated as a competition. Something both parties do their best to win, with the outcome decided by a judge. But it doesn't have to be this way. Divorce doesn't need to be a struggle between you and your ex. You have options.

A divorce alternative that is gaining popularity in Connecticut is mediation. There are benefits found in mediation that don't exist in a traditional divorce. A few of these include:

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